I went for a walk at 9:30 tonight, and when I got as far away from my house as I planned to go, it started pouring rain on me. It was kinda nice, but I would really like some decent weather so I could get to making some money again. Sitting around is BORING.
Meh. Tomorrow's another modeling class, I think it's the first photoposing one. This having a defined schedule stuff is difficult. I think I'm going to make sushi again Friday though. My dad bought a cucumber.
Wednesday, June 30, 2004
Sunday, June 27, 2004
fuck, another survey!
Sorry. You don't really have to read this if you don't want to, you can just wait until the next update.
1. Starting time: 2:09 pm
2. Full name: John Gray Heidelmeier
3. School: Klein High School
4. Hair color: Blonde
5. Gender: Male
Have you ever...?
6. Been so drunk that you blacked out: no, though the stuff goes straight to my head, so it probably wouldn't take a whole lot
7. Missed school because it was rainy: no, only when school closes can I get away with that
8. Set any body part on fire for amusement: I've burned some hairs before I suppose, but they weren't attached to my head
9. Kept a secret from EVERYBODY: yes
10. Wanted to hook up with a friend: knowing me, that's very likely
11. Cried during a flick: once or twice, I've seen American Beauty too many times for it to make much of a difference now though
12. Ever liked a teacher: one or two, I like Mr.Raddin despite his xtreme conservatism
13. Ever thought an animated character was hot: maybe once or twice, but if you look at the voice actresses that play those characters you'll change your mind real fast
14. Ever pranked called someone: I told todd I was going to kill his sister once
15. Been on stage: more times than I can count, probably half of which I've enjoyed
16. Fought with your parents: yes
18. Laughed until you cried: yes, it's very easy to do that at 3 in the morning- "you've got to wach out fo ze ice nodez"
19. Watched a sunrise or a sunset: every fucking day on the bus ride to school, AGHAHGAHG
20. Went to the beach at night: no, but I need to
21. Been mean: yes, though generally I don't try to
22. Been sarcastic: every other second of my life, I think it would be ridiculous to look at the way things work in the world right now and not be just a little enraged
23. Are you happy: yes, I'm pretty content- I've got plenty of work, money in the bank, friends, and no school
24. Are you talking to someone online: no, it still feels like morning to me despite it being 2:17 pm
25. If yes, who?: ~!
Favorites
26. Shampoo: herbal essences~!
27. Soap: I use body wash.
28. Color: today, my favorite color is that sullen, cold gray that you see in the sky during all this goddamned rain
29. Day or night: night
30. Kind of music: lounge music, somebody buy me Hydroponic Gardens by Carbon Based Lifeforms
31. Soda: Dr.Peppah
32. Car: toyota celica, those things are sexy
33. Perfume or cologne: uomo by alviero martini
34. Favorite radio station: the radio, sucks
35. Web Site: www.penny-arcade.com
36. Subject in school: ...choir
37. Least favorite subject: anything involving mathematics
38. Food: asian
39. Movie: american beauty
40. Place: our deer lease, I've just got to get the fuck out of here and shoot bullets at things sometimes
41. Holiday: the one I'm sitting in
42. Lace or satin: depends on if you're talking about clothing or other things
43. Place to chill at: anywhere as long as it's with someone else, but a really good runner up is alone at my place when there's nobody here
44. Ice cream: shokolad
45. Cartoon character: naruto~!
Friends and Crushes
46. Have a bf/gf: no, I haven't the time for that sort of thing, although I'm never lacking the desire for it
47. Loved anyone: several, now that I think about it
48. Loudest: most of my friends are pretty quiet, which is a good reason why they're my friends
49. Shyest: todd
50. Nicest: julia
51. Funniest: the guys, rob n todd
52. Craziest or silliest: sterling
53. Sweetest: ...julia
54. Who do you go to for advice: on most occasions I take my own
55. Who do you cry with: I've nothing to cry about
56. Do you talk to your crush: I suppose, I don't really have a specific "crush"
57. Have you ever missed someone: yes, some people are leaving me at the end of this summer that I will miss tp the point of severe anguish
58. Have you ever hugged someone you liked and wished you could do more than hug: yes
Do you believe in...?
59. God/Devil: I don't do mythology, dealing with my own destiny is a lot nicer
60. Love at first sight: oh certainly, but I'm pretty sure it's not mutual most of the time
61. The Big Bang Theory: it's a hell of a lot more logical than the earth being forged in six days by an invisible man only 6,000 years ago
62. Heaven/Hell: nope, and it makes me feel good to not have to worry about it
Misc.
63. Who named you: my dad, which I just learned the other day, supposedly if my mother had chosen my name it would be very different
64. When was the last time you showered: last night
65. What is right next to you: an open computer with wires hanging out, bunch of dr.pepper cans, a leather bomber jacket that I bought a few days ago
66. What is your computer desk made of: white pine
67. What are the last four digits of you phone #: 9086
68. What was the last thing you ate: homemade sushi and a piece of pizza
69. Who do you wanna spend the rest of your life with: I've actually thought this subject over quite thoroughly, and when I look at just about everyone's parents (or even adult couples who live together but have no children), I think that living alone would be a much more peaceful alternative
70. How many buddies on your list: too many, I only regularly talk to about ten of them
71. How's the weather right now: it is as if god hath shat upon our city
72. What's the weirdest thing you have ever eaten: chocolate. melted. with mustard. don't do it.
73. First son's name: I don't want children. They're bastards. I'm also one of the few Americans that doesn't aspire to that nuclear family dream
74. First daughter's name: see above
75. Scary or happy movies: scary, movies are often a lot better when the ending is really depressing or bloody
76. Talk on phone or in person: in person, I hate telephones
77. Lust or love: one comes before the other
78. Do you consider cheerleading a sport: no, I consider it a tease and a distraction, which is, well, what it is
79. Boxers or briefs: briefs~!
80. Bacon bits or croutons: croutons. I don't like the idea of somebody bottling little pieces of "bacon"
81. How long can you hold your breath?: quite awhile, but it's sort of dumb because every time there's a contest I just end up being underwater forever, and everybody leaves
82. Disneyworld or Disneyland: "fuck mickey mouse!"
83. Do you do drugs: no, I prefer to stay cognizant, and somehow fucking yourself up to feel good seems like a shitty way to feel good to me, reminds me of a story my dad told me about his friend (my dad sort of hung around with some scary people, don't ask): his buddy was doing LSD, and all trippin and whatnot, and takes off all his clothes and runs down a street at night, sees his reflection in a shop window, and jumps through it because it scares the shit out of him, killing himself with a bunch of shards of glass
84. Do you make fun of people: quite a bit, but it's most justified
85. Have you ever been convicted of a crime: no, I'm a virtuous little choirboy, right?
86. One pillow or two...: two
87. Piercing or tattoo: neither, I really don't want to be in a nursing home someday with a bunch of other old farts asking me "where'd ya get that one?" and then I answer "I forfuckinggot" because I'm senile
88. What's your bedtime: 1 to 2 am
89. Adidas, Nike, or Reebok: neither, they're all too goddamned expensive for a pair of shoes
90. Most embarassing moment: there are a few, I don't feel like unearthing them
91. Do you attend church regularly: no, because, er, I think it's retarded
92. What do you look for in the opposite sex: a brrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiin and a liberal point of view
93. Favorite quotes: I think my favorite is at the top of my blog. I don't mean by putting it there that we shouldn't speculate too much, because we should take everything into consideration, but that mysticism generally sucks, and we should try and remain down to earth
94. Do you like to swim: not really, but I like to hang out at the pool
95. Do you have a job: I do a lot of odd jobs, mostly manual labor
96. Pools or ocean: pool, that whole jellyfish thing is a real turnoff
97. Pencil or pen: pencil
98. Who's better, boys or girls: girls, sometimes I resent being male because of all the fuckdicks out there
99. Do you sing in the shower: nah
100. Who is the best looking person: if you mean regarding celebrities, I don't really know
101. The best way to die: ...with your boots on.
102. When do you want to die: I think it's safe to say that nobody wants to die~
103. Have you ever called an 800 number: no, I do my own tech support for stuff
104. Would you ever go bungee-jumping: you know, for some reason, it just never seemed like a very good idea to me
105. Would you rather be short, semi-tall, tall: semi-tall to short, though I wouldn't make it in the modeling industry
106. Do you enjoy reading: yes, but I don't do it all that much during the summer
107. Which Winnie the Pooh character is you favorite: they're all a bit disturbing
108. What was the last movie you saw: Kill Bill vol. 1
109. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: nope
110. What is your zodiac sign: virgo
111. Would you ever have cosmetic surgery: probably not, if somebody ate my face off I'd probably get that taken care of though
112. Do you like to dance: I don't, really
113. What do you think of people who drink: reeed reeed wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine... I dunno, I like a glass of wine with dinner, but hard liquor is generally really disgusting, and I think being able to think is a really important asset
114. People who do drugs: not my problem, but you've only got one life
115. Better to laugh or cry: laugh
116. Do you think men and women could ever be just friends: yeah
117. Do you bite your nails: used to, but I've got nothing to be nervous about anymore
118. What is your worst habit: sometimes unsure of myself, but much less so than in the past, I'm more confident now and really like getting out of the house
119. Did you ever cry over someone of the opposite sex: yes
120. Who in your life is the biggest role model: father
121. Who was your first crush: I don't think I really had any. just sort of waited for people to come to me
122. Do you organize your cds: no, they're all thrown about the room
123. Who makes fun of you the most: doesn't happen that often (to my knowledge) "happy birthday, jackass!"
124. Ending time: 3:17, wtf, you wasted an hour of my life and nobody will care about reading this~
1. Starting time: 2:09 pm
2. Full name: John Gray Heidelmeier
3. School: Klein High School
4. Hair color: Blonde
5. Gender: Male
Have you ever...?
6. Been so drunk that you blacked out: no, though the stuff goes straight to my head, so it probably wouldn't take a whole lot
7. Missed school because it was rainy: no, only when school closes can I get away with that
8. Set any body part on fire for amusement: I've burned some hairs before I suppose, but they weren't attached to my head
9. Kept a secret from EVERYBODY: yes
10. Wanted to hook up with a friend: knowing me, that's very likely
11. Cried during a flick: once or twice, I've seen American Beauty too many times for it to make much of a difference now though
12. Ever liked a teacher: one or two, I like Mr.Raddin despite his xtreme conservatism
13. Ever thought an animated character was hot: maybe once or twice, but if you look at the voice actresses that play those characters you'll change your mind real fast
14. Ever pranked called someone: I told todd I was going to kill his sister once
15. Been on stage: more times than I can count, probably half of which I've enjoyed
16. Fought with your parents: yes
18. Laughed until you cried: yes, it's very easy to do that at 3 in the morning- "you've got to wach out fo ze ice nodez"
19. Watched a sunrise or a sunset: every fucking day on the bus ride to school, AGHAHGAHG
20. Went to the beach at night: no, but I need to
21. Been mean: yes, though generally I don't try to
22. Been sarcastic: every other second of my life, I think it would be ridiculous to look at the way things work in the world right now and not be just a little enraged
23. Are you happy: yes, I'm pretty content- I've got plenty of work, money in the bank, friends, and no school
24. Are you talking to someone online: no, it still feels like morning to me despite it being 2:17 pm
25. If yes, who?: ~!
Favorites
26. Shampoo: herbal essences~!
27. Soap: I use body wash.
28. Color: today, my favorite color is that sullen, cold gray that you see in the sky during all this goddamned rain
29. Day or night: night
30. Kind of music: lounge music, somebody buy me Hydroponic Gardens by Carbon Based Lifeforms
31. Soda: Dr.Peppah
32. Car: toyota celica, those things are sexy
33. Perfume or cologne: uomo by alviero martini
34. Favorite radio station: the radio, sucks
35. Web Site: www.penny-arcade.com
36. Subject in school: ...choir
37. Least favorite subject: anything involving mathematics
38. Food: asian
39. Movie: american beauty
40. Place: our deer lease, I've just got to get the fuck out of here and shoot bullets at things sometimes
41. Holiday: the one I'm sitting in
42. Lace or satin: depends on if you're talking about clothing or other things
43. Place to chill at: anywhere as long as it's with someone else, but a really good runner up is alone at my place when there's nobody here
44. Ice cream: shokolad
45. Cartoon character: naruto~!
Friends and Crushes
46. Have a bf/gf: no, I haven't the time for that sort of thing, although I'm never lacking the desire for it
47. Loved anyone: several, now that I think about it
48. Loudest: most of my friends are pretty quiet, which is a good reason why they're my friends
49. Shyest: todd
50. Nicest: julia
51. Funniest: the guys, rob n todd
52. Craziest or silliest: sterling
53. Sweetest: ...julia
54. Who do you go to for advice: on most occasions I take my own
55. Who do you cry with: I've nothing to cry about
56. Do you talk to your crush: I suppose, I don't really have a specific "crush"
57. Have you ever missed someone: yes, some people are leaving me at the end of this summer that I will miss tp the point of severe anguish
58. Have you ever hugged someone you liked and wished you could do more than hug: yes
Do you believe in...?
59. God/Devil: I don't do mythology, dealing with my own destiny is a lot nicer
60. Love at first sight: oh certainly, but I'm pretty sure it's not mutual most of the time
61. The Big Bang Theory: it's a hell of a lot more logical than the earth being forged in six days by an invisible man only 6,000 years ago
62. Heaven/Hell: nope, and it makes me feel good to not have to worry about it
Misc.
63. Who named you: my dad, which I just learned the other day, supposedly if my mother had chosen my name it would be very different
64. When was the last time you showered: last night
65. What is right next to you: an open computer with wires hanging out, bunch of dr.pepper cans, a leather bomber jacket that I bought a few days ago
66. What is your computer desk made of: white pine
67. What are the last four digits of you phone #: 9086
68. What was the last thing you ate: homemade sushi and a piece of pizza
69. Who do you wanna spend the rest of your life with: I've actually thought this subject over quite thoroughly, and when I look at just about everyone's parents (or even adult couples who live together but have no children), I think that living alone would be a much more peaceful alternative
70. How many buddies on your list: too many, I only regularly talk to about ten of them
71. How's the weather right now: it is as if god hath shat upon our city
72. What's the weirdest thing you have ever eaten: chocolate. melted. with mustard. don't do it.
73. First son's name: I don't want children. They're bastards. I'm also one of the few Americans that doesn't aspire to that nuclear family dream
74. First daughter's name: see above
75. Scary or happy movies: scary, movies are often a lot better when the ending is really depressing or bloody
76. Talk on phone or in person: in person, I hate telephones
77. Lust or love: one comes before the other
78. Do you consider cheerleading a sport: no, I consider it a tease and a distraction, which is, well, what it is
79. Boxers or briefs: briefs~!
80. Bacon bits or croutons: croutons. I don't like the idea of somebody bottling little pieces of "bacon"
81. How long can you hold your breath?: quite awhile, but it's sort of dumb because every time there's a contest I just end up being underwater forever, and everybody leaves
82. Disneyworld or Disneyland: "fuck mickey mouse!"
83. Do you do drugs: no, I prefer to stay cognizant, and somehow fucking yourself up to feel good seems like a shitty way to feel good to me, reminds me of a story my dad told me about his friend (my dad sort of hung around with some scary people, don't ask): his buddy was doing LSD, and all trippin and whatnot, and takes off all his clothes and runs down a street at night, sees his reflection in a shop window, and jumps through it because it scares the shit out of him, killing himself with a bunch of shards of glass
84. Do you make fun of people: quite a bit, but it's most justified
85. Have you ever been convicted of a crime: no, I'm a virtuous little choirboy, right?
86. One pillow or two...: two
87. Piercing or tattoo: neither, I really don't want to be in a nursing home someday with a bunch of other old farts asking me "where'd ya get that one?" and then I answer "I forfuckinggot" because I'm senile
88. What's your bedtime: 1 to 2 am
89. Adidas, Nike, or Reebok: neither, they're all too goddamned expensive for a pair of shoes
90. Most embarassing moment: there are a few, I don't feel like unearthing them
91. Do you attend church regularly: no, because, er, I think it's retarded
92. What do you look for in the opposite sex: a brrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiin and a liberal point of view
93. Favorite quotes: I think my favorite is at the top of my blog. I don't mean by putting it there that we shouldn't speculate too much, because we should take everything into consideration, but that mysticism generally sucks, and we should try and remain down to earth
94. Do you like to swim: not really, but I like to hang out at the pool
95. Do you have a job: I do a lot of odd jobs, mostly manual labor
96. Pools or ocean: pool, that whole jellyfish thing is a real turnoff
97. Pencil or pen: pencil
98. Who's better, boys or girls: girls, sometimes I resent being male because of all the fuckdicks out there
99. Do you sing in the shower: nah
100. Who is the best looking person: if you mean regarding celebrities, I don't really know
101. The best way to die: ...with your boots on.
102. When do you want to die: I think it's safe to say that nobody wants to die~
103. Have you ever called an 800 number: no, I do my own tech support for stuff
104. Would you ever go bungee-jumping: you know, for some reason, it just never seemed like a very good idea to me
105. Would you rather be short, semi-tall, tall: semi-tall to short, though I wouldn't make it in the modeling industry
106. Do you enjoy reading: yes, but I don't do it all that much during the summer
107. Which Winnie the Pooh character is you favorite: they're all a bit disturbing
108. What was the last movie you saw: Kill Bill vol. 1
109. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: nope
110. What is your zodiac sign: virgo
111. Would you ever have cosmetic surgery: probably not, if somebody ate my face off I'd probably get that taken care of though
112. Do you like to dance: I don't, really
113. What do you think of people who drink: reeed reeed wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine... I dunno, I like a glass of wine with dinner, but hard liquor is generally really disgusting, and I think being able to think is a really important asset
114. People who do drugs: not my problem, but you've only got one life
115. Better to laugh or cry: laugh
116. Do you think men and women could ever be just friends: yeah
117. Do you bite your nails: used to, but I've got nothing to be nervous about anymore
118. What is your worst habit: sometimes unsure of myself, but much less so than in the past, I'm more confident now and really like getting out of the house
119. Did you ever cry over someone of the opposite sex: yes
120. Who in your life is the biggest role model: father
121. Who was your first crush: I don't think I really had any. just sort of waited for people to come to me
122. Do you organize your cds: no, they're all thrown about the room
123. Who makes fun of you the most: doesn't happen that often (to my knowledge) "happy birthday, jackass!"
124. Ending time: 3:17, wtf, you wasted an hour of my life and nobody will care about reading this~
Hey.
Nice and quiet around here. Parents were gone for a lot of today, and I got home from Rob's place, which I spent the night at, at about noon. Put on some lounge music and just sort of hung around. It's nice when you have no work to do and can just sink into a couch and let the cushions absorb all that soreness you can accumulate from a week's worth of work. Made some sushi out of boredom. Walked around the neighborhood at midnight. It's really amazing how peaceful it gets around here. I just sat on a curb at my old elementary school for probably a half hour while it drizzled on me real lightly. I think I really, really needed to get out of school and into summer vacation.
Nice and quiet around here. Parents were gone for a lot of today, and I got home from Rob's place, which I spent the night at, at about noon. Put on some lounge music and just sort of hung around. It's nice when you have no work to do and can just sink into a couch and let the cushions absorb all that soreness you can accumulate from a week's worth of work. Made some sushi out of boredom. Walked around the neighborhood at midnight. It's really amazing how peaceful it gets around here. I just sat on a curb at my old elementary school for probably a half hour while it drizzled on me real lightly. I think I really, really needed to get out of school and into summer vacation.
Monday, June 21, 2004
I have found what I want to do with my life.
Tonight, I cooked a complete dinner for two of my neighbors on their 35th wedding anniversary. The preparation was flawless, from the garlic mashed potatoes to the vegetable medley to the veal scallopini with port wine sauce and oyster mushrooms to the chocolate cake and focaccia. It is a beautifully exciting and terrifying thing to blacken seafood--to throw your twenty dollars of choice scallops, shrimp and salmon into a glowing-hot skillet and see it all instantly enveloped in a giant miasma of smoke and flame to be tossed out of it all perfectly a mere minute later. I spent 13 dollars in forty seconds when I flash-fried my pink veal cutlets (the butcher thought me mad, a 16 year-old kid buying quite a bit of very expensive meat). Flames shot out of the pool of cheap red wine as it smacked against the skillet with a screaming sizzle. I made some people really happy tonight; they hugged and thanked me as I left their kitchen with my box of assorted cookware (I cooked at my place on the gas range and brought my products next door). I forgot that they paid me, because money means nothing after all that. And I would be nothing without my father, who is a great, wise and practical man, and my mother, pastry chef extraordinaire whose advice had I not had the luxury of (not to mention years of teaching me tidbits of information), I would've broken down and cried into my cake batter.
Tonight, I cooked a complete dinner for two of my neighbors on their 35th wedding anniversary. The preparation was flawless, from the garlic mashed potatoes to the vegetable medley to the veal scallopini with port wine sauce and oyster mushrooms to the chocolate cake and focaccia. It is a beautifully exciting and terrifying thing to blacken seafood--to throw your twenty dollars of choice scallops, shrimp and salmon into a glowing-hot skillet and see it all instantly enveloped in a giant miasma of smoke and flame to be tossed out of it all perfectly a mere minute later. I spent 13 dollars in forty seconds when I flash-fried my pink veal cutlets (the butcher thought me mad, a 16 year-old kid buying quite a bit of very expensive meat). Flames shot out of the pool of cheap red wine as it smacked against the skillet with a screaming sizzle. I made some people really happy tonight; they hugged and thanked me as I left their kitchen with my box of assorted cookware (I cooked at my place on the gas range and brought my products next door). I forgot that they paid me, because money means nothing after all that. And I would be nothing without my father, who is a great, wise and practical man, and my mother, pastry chef extraordinaire whose advice had I not had the luxury of (not to mention years of teaching me tidbits of information), I would've broken down and cried into my cake batter.
Sunday, June 20, 2004
Friday, June 18, 2004
I single-handedly moved about three tons of bricks, rocks, iron scraps, dirt, and other shit today for a neighbor who's selling his house and needs the yard cleaned up. Tomorrow I'm moving more shit out of his toolshed. I get paid pretty well for being insane.
My summer seems to have gone from being excrutiatingly boring to incredibly busy; all the grunt work I'm doing for people (mowing lawns, doing assorted landscaping projects, breaking a big hole in my driveway with a sledgehammer) is enabling me to pay 40 bucks a week for the modeling classes, and I don't owe my mother any more money. Monday, I've got my neighbors' 35th wedding anniversary to cater for, and between yardwork this weekend, I have to devise a sauce from scratch, decide on a chocolate pastry to serve for dessert, and learn how to make veal scallopini. I've also got to shop for numerous expensive ingredients. And I'm getting paid for it all. Imagine that--I don't really think of it as work.
My summer seems to have gone from being excrutiatingly boring to incredibly busy; all the grunt work I'm doing for people (mowing lawns, doing assorted landscaping projects, breaking a big hole in my driveway with a sledgehammer) is enabling me to pay 40 bucks a week for the modeling classes, and I don't owe my mother any more money. Monday, I've got my neighbors' 35th wedding anniversary to cater for, and between yardwork this weekend, I have to devise a sauce from scratch, decide on a chocolate pastry to serve for dessert, and learn how to make veal scallopini. I've also got to shop for numerous expensive ingredients. And I'm getting paid for it all. Imagine that--I don't really think of it as work.
Thursday, June 17, 2004
omgboringsurveythatnoonecaresaboutbutmeatmidniiiiiight~
First ...
Job: Mowing lawns.
Screen name: JohnH778
Pet: I have a 60-pound Austrailian dog not meant to be kept as a pet.
Piercing: none
Tattoo: I had Strongbad on my mighty arm once, but decided on my skin as being better.
Credit card: I'm 16, so not going to fuck with credit for as long as possible, even though I wouldn't be retarded about it like people on Oprah who are 29,000 dollars in debt and wonder why even though they spend like 500 dollars a week on eating out
Kiss: mary
Best friend: I knew this guy named Bill in Chicago that I hung out with all the time.
Wedding: never been to one
Last ...
Car ride: in my mum's delightfully American SUV
Kiss: I bit Rob's cat, which probably counts
Movie watched: Kill Bill at Todd's house
Beverage drank: SANGRIA! no, that was awhile ago, the last thing I finished drinking was apple juice+cactus wine
Food consumed: some soup I made
Phone call: was to Todd to get him out of his house
Road trip: goddamn, I can't even remember, which means I need to take one
Time showered: yesterday when I got home from working my ass off
CD played: I don't do CDs, they cost money
Time you cooked from scratch: about ten minutes ago
Time you cut your toenails: a few days ago
Now ...
Single or Taken: single
Sex: male
Birthday: August 23
Sign: Virgo
Siblings: none, legend has it that I used to have some but my dad accidentally shot them all at 3 AM because he keeps too many loaded guns in the house
Hair color: blondie, considering going blue again
Eye color: blue
Shoe size: 8
Height: 5'11"
Wearing: pair of green (or gray, now) pants from Target that I've had for about three years
Drinking: teh dr.peppar
Thinking about: how late I'll get to sleep tomorrow before sterling comes and bothers me to work on a yard
Listening to: a mixtape by DJ LRCN
Job: Mowing lawns.
Screen name: JohnH778
Pet: I have a 60-pound Austrailian dog not meant to be kept as a pet.
Piercing: none
Tattoo: I had Strongbad on my mighty arm once, but decided on my skin as being better.
Credit card: I'm 16, so not going to fuck with credit for as long as possible, even though I wouldn't be retarded about it like people on Oprah who are 29,000 dollars in debt and wonder why even though they spend like 500 dollars a week on eating out
Kiss: mary
Best friend: I knew this guy named Bill in Chicago that I hung out with all the time.
Wedding: never been to one
Last ...
Car ride: in my mum's delightfully American SUV
Kiss: I bit Rob's cat, which probably counts
Movie watched: Kill Bill at Todd's house
Beverage drank: SANGRIA! no, that was awhile ago, the last thing I finished drinking was apple juice+cactus wine
Food consumed: some soup I made
Phone call: was to Todd to get him out of his house
Road trip: goddamn, I can't even remember, which means I need to take one
Time showered: yesterday when I got home from working my ass off
CD played: I don't do CDs, they cost money
Time you cooked from scratch: about ten minutes ago
Time you cut your toenails: a few days ago
Now ...
Single or Taken: single
Sex: male
Birthday: August 23
Sign: Virgo
Siblings: none, legend has it that I used to have some but my dad accidentally shot them all at 3 AM because he keeps too many loaded guns in the house
Hair color: blondie, considering going blue again
Eye color: blue
Shoe size: 8
Height: 5'11"
Wearing: pair of green (or gray, now) pants from Target that I've had for about three years
Drinking: teh dr.peppar
Thinking about: how late I'll get to sleep tomorrow before sterling comes and bothers me to work on a yard
Listening to: a mixtape by DJ LRCN
Monday, June 14, 2004
Sunday, June 13, 2004
Wednesday, June 09, 2004
wtfing f
Okay, I just got this spam email for digital cable. It has a picture of a TV and a cable box above a caption that says:
"mortician over toothpick organize about fruit cake.living with tabloid prays, but bubble bath for cyprus mulch admonish shadow related to.When you see toward guardian angel, it means that pig pen of reads a magazine.But they need to remember how lazily widow toward onlooker hibernates.
burtt anchoritism path checkerberry"
What the fuck?
"mortician over toothpick organize about fruit cake.living with tabloid prays, but bubble bath for cyprus mulch admonish shadow related to.When you see toward guardian angel, it means that pig pen of reads a magazine.But they need to remember how lazily widow toward onlooker hibernates.
burtt anchoritism path checkerberry"
What the fuck?
Tuesday, June 08, 2004
Saw something infuriating in someone's profile.
" An old farmer and a doctor were talking about Senator John Kerry possibly being in the White House one day. The old farmer said, "Well, ya know, that Mr. Kerry is what we call a 'post turtle'."
Not knowing what the old man meant, the doctor asked him what a post turtle was.
The old man said, "You know. When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a post turtle."
The old man saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain, "You know he didn't get there by himself, he doesn't belong there, he can't get anything done while he's up there, and you just want to help the poor stupid fool get down so he can crawl away." "
So, is Bush the better alternative? He wants to keep soldiers in Iraq indefinitely. If you vote for him, you're basically voting for the death of all our buddies that are joining this ridiculous foreign entanglement. What the fuck is wrong with people? We seem to love war. Bush is the post turtle, guys; he got up there because his family is just a political legacy (with the money to fund his campaign, I might add), and now that he's there, he's doing nothing but ignoring civil rights, regressing Clinton's programs, and killing people while driving the government in a spiraling debt. It's also noteworthy that we pretty much have no allies left. Rise of conservatism = rise of war.
" An old farmer and a doctor were talking about Senator John Kerry possibly being in the White House one day. The old farmer said, "Well, ya know, that Mr. Kerry is what we call a 'post turtle'."
Not knowing what the old man meant, the doctor asked him what a post turtle was.
The old man said, "You know. When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a post turtle."
The old man saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain, "You know he didn't get there by himself, he doesn't belong there, he can't get anything done while he's up there, and you just want to help the poor stupid fool get down so he can crawl away." "
So, is Bush the better alternative? He wants to keep soldiers in Iraq indefinitely. If you vote for him, you're basically voting for the death of all our buddies that are joining this ridiculous foreign entanglement. What the fuck is wrong with people? We seem to love war. Bush is the post turtle, guys; he got up there because his family is just a political legacy (with the money to fund his campaign, I might add), and now that he's there, he's doing nothing but ignoring civil rights, regressing Clinton's programs, and killing people while driving the government in a spiraling debt. It's also noteworthy that we pretty much have no allies left. Rise of conservatism = rise of war.
My fellow juniors, a word of advice: don't look at next year as being "only one more damned year". Look at it as being the last year, something to savor before we all go our seperate ways and quit being kids. If you take every increment of time in your life as a sort of "if I just get this over with, the next will be better" situation, you will wake up someday, at age 75, and wish you could travel back to all those shitty moments sitting in AP English. I'm convinced of it, and I'm only 16.
There's still another year of high school left. That's kinda cool--I liked this one.
There's still another year of high school left. That's kinda cool--I liked this one.
Saturday, June 05, 2004
Something old from Albino Black Sheep that explains why I really, really just don't do religion. I think it makes just about every good point that needs to be made when a guy like me hears a religious tale and just goes, "what?"
Kissing Hank's Ass
This morning there was a knock at my door. When I answered the door I found a well-groomed, nicely dressed couple. The man spoke first:
John: "Hi! I'm John and this is Mary."
Mary: "Hi! We're here to invite you to come kiss Hank's ass with us."
Me: "Pardon me?! What are you talking about? Who's Hank, and why would I want to kiss his ass?"
John: "If you kiss Hank's ass, he'll give you a million dollars; and if you don't, he'll kick the shit out of you."
Me: "What? Is this some kind of bizarre mob shake-down?"
John: "Hank is a billionaire philanthropist. Hank built this town. Hank owns this town. He can do anything he wants, and what he wants is to give you a million dollars, but he can't until you kiss his ass."
Me: "That doesn't make any sense. Why..."
Mary: "Who are you to question Hank's gift? Don't you want a million dollars? Isn't it worth a little kiss on the ass?"
Me: "Well maybe, if it's legit, but..."
John: "Then come kiss Hank's ass with us."
Me: "Do you kiss Hank's ass often?"
Mary: "Oh yes, all the time..."
Me: "And has he given you a million dollars?"
John: "Well no, you don't actually get the money until you leave town."
Me: "So why don't you just leave town now?"
Mary: "You can't leave until Hank tells you to, or you don't get the money and he kicks the shit out of you."
Me: "Do you know anyone who kissed Hank's ass, left town, and got the million dollars?"
John: "My mother kissed Hank's ass for years. She left town last year, and I'm sure she got the money."
Me: "Haven't you talked to her since then?"
John: "Of course not, Hank doesn't allow it."
Me: "So what makes you think he'll actually give you the money if you've never talked to anyone who got the money?"
Mary: "Well, he gives you a little bit befcore you leave. Maybe you'll get a raise, maybe you'll win a small lotto, maybe you'll just find a twenty dollar bill on the street."
Me: "What's that got to do with Hank?"
John: "Hank has certain 'connections'."
Me: "I'm sorry, but this sounds like some sort of bizarre con game."
John: "But it's a million dollars, can you really take the chance? And remember, if you don't kiss Hank's ass he'll kick the shit out of you."
Me: "Maybe if I could see Hank, talk to him, get the details straight from him..."
John: "No one sees Hank, no one talks to Hank."
Me: "Then how do you kiss his ass?"
John: "Sometimes we just blow him a kiss, and think of his ass. Other times we kiss Karl's ass, and he passes it on."
Me: "Who's Karl?"
Mary: "A friend of ours. He's the one who taught us all about kissing Hank's ass. All we had to do is take him out to dinner a few times."
Me: "And you just took his word for it when he said there was a Hank, that Hank wanted you to kiss his ass, and that Hank would reward you?"
John: "Oh no! Karl's got a letter Hank sent him years ago explaining the whole thing. Here's a copy; see for yourself."
From the desk of Karl
1. Kiss Hank's ass and he'll give you a million dollars when you leave town.
2. Drink only in moderation.
3. Kick the shit out of people who aren't like you.
4. Eat right.
5. Hank dictated this list himself.
6. The Moon is made of green cheese.
7. Everything Hank says is right.
8. Wash your hands after going to the bathroom.
9. Don't use alcohol.
10. Eat your wieners on buns, no condiments.
11. Kiss Hank's ass or he'll kick the shit out of you.
Me: "This would appear to be written on Karl's letterhead."
Mary: "Hank didn't have any paper."
Me: "I have a hunch that if we checked, we'd find this is Karl's handwriting."
John: "Of course, Hank dictated it."
Me: "I thought you said no one gets to see Hank?"
Mary: "Not now, but years ago he would talk to some people."
Me: "I thought you said Hank was a philanthropist. What sort of philanthropist kicks the shit out of people just because they're different?"
Mary: "It's what Hank wants, and Hank's always right."
Me: "How do you figure that?"
Mary: "Item 7 says 'Everything Hank says is right.' That's good enough for me!"
Me: "Maybe your friend Karl just made the whole thing up."
John: "No way! Item 5 says 'Hank dictated this list himself.' Besides, item 2 says 'Drink in moderation,' item 4 says 'Eat right,' and item 8 says 'Wash your hands after going to the bathroom.' Everyone knows those things are right, so the rest must be true, too."
Me: "But 9 says 'Don't use alcohol,' which doesn't quite go with item 2, and 6 says 'The Moon is made of green cheese,' which is just plain wrong."
John: "There's no contradiction between 9 and 2, 9 just clarifies 2. As far as 6 goes, you've never been to the Moon, so you can't say for sure."
Me: "Scientists have pretty firmly established that the Moon is made of rock..."
Mary: "But they don't know if the rock came from the Earth, or from out of space, so it could just as easily be green cheese."
Me: "I'm not really an expert, but I think the theory that the Moon came from the Earth has been discounted. Besides, not knowing where the rock came from doesn't make it cheese."
John: "Aha! You just admitted that scientists make mistakes, but we know Hank is always right!"
Me: "We do?"
John: "Of course we do, item 7 says so."
Me: "You're saying Hank's always right because the list says so, the list is right because Hank dictated it, and we know Hank dictated it because the list says so. That's circular logic, no different than saying 'Hank's right because he says he's right.'"
John: "Now you're getting it! It's so rewarding to see someone come around to Hank's way of thinking."
Me: "But... oh, never mind. What's the deal with wieners?"
Mary blushes.
John: "Wieners, in buns, no condiments. It's Hank's way. Anything else is wrong."
Me: "What if I don't have a bun?"
John: "No bun, no wiener. A wiener without a bun is wrong."
Me: "No relish? No mustard?"
Mary looks positively stricken.
John shouts: "There's no need for such language! Condiments of any kind are wrong!"
Me: "So a big pile of sauerkraut with some wieners chopped up in it would be out of the question?"
Mary sticks her fingers in her ears: "I am not listening to this. La la la, la la, la la la."
John: "That's disgusting. Only some sort of evil deviant would eat that..."
Me: "It's good! I eat it all the time."
Mary faints.
John catches her: "Well, if I'd known you were one of those I wouldn't have wasted my time. When Hank kicks the shit out of you, I'll be there, counting my money and laughing. I'll kiss Hank's ass for you, you bunless cut-wienered kraut-eater."
With this, John dragged Mary to their waiting car, and sped off.
Don't kiss someone's ass just because somebody told you it's a good idea.
Kissing Hank's Ass
This morning there was a knock at my door. When I answered the door I found a well-groomed, nicely dressed couple. The man spoke first:
John: "Hi! I'm John and this is Mary."
Mary: "Hi! We're here to invite you to come kiss Hank's ass with us."
Me: "Pardon me?! What are you talking about? Who's Hank, and why would I want to kiss his ass?"
John: "If you kiss Hank's ass, he'll give you a million dollars; and if you don't, he'll kick the shit out of you."
Me: "What? Is this some kind of bizarre mob shake-down?"
John: "Hank is a billionaire philanthropist. Hank built this town. Hank owns this town. He can do anything he wants, and what he wants is to give you a million dollars, but he can't until you kiss his ass."
Me: "That doesn't make any sense. Why..."
Mary: "Who are you to question Hank's gift? Don't you want a million dollars? Isn't it worth a little kiss on the ass?"
Me: "Well maybe, if it's legit, but..."
John: "Then come kiss Hank's ass with us."
Me: "Do you kiss Hank's ass often?"
Mary: "Oh yes, all the time..."
Me: "And has he given you a million dollars?"
John: "Well no, you don't actually get the money until you leave town."
Me: "So why don't you just leave town now?"
Mary: "You can't leave until Hank tells you to, or you don't get the money and he kicks the shit out of you."
Me: "Do you know anyone who kissed Hank's ass, left town, and got the million dollars?"
John: "My mother kissed Hank's ass for years. She left town last year, and I'm sure she got the money."
Me: "Haven't you talked to her since then?"
John: "Of course not, Hank doesn't allow it."
Me: "So what makes you think he'll actually give you the money if you've never talked to anyone who got the money?"
Mary: "Well, he gives you a little bit befcore you leave. Maybe you'll get a raise, maybe you'll win a small lotto, maybe you'll just find a twenty dollar bill on the street."
Me: "What's that got to do with Hank?"
John: "Hank has certain 'connections'."
Me: "I'm sorry, but this sounds like some sort of bizarre con game."
John: "But it's a million dollars, can you really take the chance? And remember, if you don't kiss Hank's ass he'll kick the shit out of you."
Me: "Maybe if I could see Hank, talk to him, get the details straight from him..."
John: "No one sees Hank, no one talks to Hank."
Me: "Then how do you kiss his ass?"
John: "Sometimes we just blow him a kiss, and think of his ass. Other times we kiss Karl's ass, and he passes it on."
Me: "Who's Karl?"
Mary: "A friend of ours. He's the one who taught us all about kissing Hank's ass. All we had to do is take him out to dinner a few times."
Me: "And you just took his word for it when he said there was a Hank, that Hank wanted you to kiss his ass, and that Hank would reward you?"
John: "Oh no! Karl's got a letter Hank sent him years ago explaining the whole thing. Here's a copy; see for yourself."
From the desk of Karl
1. Kiss Hank's ass and he'll give you a million dollars when you leave town.
2. Drink only in moderation.
3. Kick the shit out of people who aren't like you.
4. Eat right.
5. Hank dictated this list himself.
6. The Moon is made of green cheese.
7. Everything Hank says is right.
8. Wash your hands after going to the bathroom.
9. Don't use alcohol.
10. Eat your wieners on buns, no condiments.
11. Kiss Hank's ass or he'll kick the shit out of you.
Me: "This would appear to be written on Karl's letterhead."
Mary: "Hank didn't have any paper."
Me: "I have a hunch that if we checked, we'd find this is Karl's handwriting."
John: "Of course, Hank dictated it."
Me: "I thought you said no one gets to see Hank?"
Mary: "Not now, but years ago he would talk to some people."
Me: "I thought you said Hank was a philanthropist. What sort of philanthropist kicks the shit out of people just because they're different?"
Mary: "It's what Hank wants, and Hank's always right."
Me: "How do you figure that?"
Mary: "Item 7 says 'Everything Hank says is right.' That's good enough for me!"
Me: "Maybe your friend Karl just made the whole thing up."
John: "No way! Item 5 says 'Hank dictated this list himself.' Besides, item 2 says 'Drink in moderation,' item 4 says 'Eat right,' and item 8 says 'Wash your hands after going to the bathroom.' Everyone knows those things are right, so the rest must be true, too."
Me: "But 9 says 'Don't use alcohol,' which doesn't quite go with item 2, and 6 says 'The Moon is made of green cheese,' which is just plain wrong."
John: "There's no contradiction between 9 and 2, 9 just clarifies 2. As far as 6 goes, you've never been to the Moon, so you can't say for sure."
Me: "Scientists have pretty firmly established that the Moon is made of rock..."
Mary: "But they don't know if the rock came from the Earth, or from out of space, so it could just as easily be green cheese."
Me: "I'm not really an expert, but I think the theory that the Moon came from the Earth has been discounted. Besides, not knowing where the rock came from doesn't make it cheese."
John: "Aha! You just admitted that scientists make mistakes, but we know Hank is always right!"
Me: "We do?"
John: "Of course we do, item 7 says so."
Me: "You're saying Hank's always right because the list says so, the list is right because Hank dictated it, and we know Hank dictated it because the list says so. That's circular logic, no different than saying 'Hank's right because he says he's right.'"
John: "Now you're getting it! It's so rewarding to see someone come around to Hank's way of thinking."
Me: "But... oh, never mind. What's the deal with wieners?"
Mary blushes.
John: "Wieners, in buns, no condiments. It's Hank's way. Anything else is wrong."
Me: "What if I don't have a bun?"
John: "No bun, no wiener. A wiener without a bun is wrong."
Me: "No relish? No mustard?"
Mary looks positively stricken.
John shouts: "There's no need for such language! Condiments of any kind are wrong!"
Me: "So a big pile of sauerkraut with some wieners chopped up in it would be out of the question?"
Mary sticks her fingers in her ears: "I am not listening to this. La la la, la la, la la la."
John: "That's disgusting. Only some sort of evil deviant would eat that..."
Me: "It's good! I eat it all the time."
Mary faints.
John catches her: "Well, if I'd known you were one of those I wouldn't have wasted my time. When Hank kicks the shit out of you, I'll be there, counting my money and laughing. I'll kiss Hank's ass for you, you bunless cut-wienered kraut-eater."
With this, John dragged Mary to their waiting car, and sped off.
Don't kiss someone's ass just because somebody told you it's a good idea.
Wednesday, June 02, 2004
Yawn. And now for approximately two and a half months of not caring about much of anything. I've got 110 dollars in my pocket right now from mowing lawns, went to a party last night, just sitting around right now. Yep, just sitting. It's badass.
I've done something really different with my songwriting recently; rather than try to achieve insanely complex polyphonic synth sounds at 140 tempo, I quit the hard trance thing for awhile and made a really mellow, lounge-esque track in Fruity Loops. It's not perfect, but has some neat, varying drum patterns, some real smooth flanged pads, and a simple bass line. I think the "chillout" genre is actually more my kind of thing, although my song with the "Curses, I've been double-crossed by my own devilish magnetic device!" quote is pretty funny despite its generic techno sound. I guess at least Mr.Raddin taught me the difference between major and minor chords. Ask me on AIM and I'll send you the lounge track.
Went to the pool today with Sterling. It's amazing; I remember in my youth I'd go swimming for four to five hours at a time with people, and yet I almost never do it now. I think I'll probably get awful skin cancer from all that someday, but oh well. After the pool, Sterling and I just kinda walked to Jackpot Pizza, and, well, ordered a pizza. We ate it in these people's lawn, and they didn't really mind, which was cool. I really enjoy the freedom of being able to spend money and yet not having to worry about paying for anything that requires any real responsibility, like cars, bills, insurance, etc. I probably ought to get my license soon anyway though.
Tomorrow's the first runway class in my series of modeling classes. Last week's was actually really informative, despite how ridiculous me and a bunch of black guys looked applying foundation and concealer. Learned that it's actually a bad idea to use products that are 46% alcohol to treat acne, and as a result I bought some decent skincare stuff at Walgreens and my face is looking a lot better. Yay for metrosexual people. Jesus God, I actually bought some blue jeans awhile ago too, and I like them. It's okay, though, because they're not nearly as cool as my goth pants.
Fucking Texas is hot. I think I just realized that after living here for ten years. It's really hot here. When I leave home I'm going to go to New England and bask in the freezing cold weather in winter.
I've done something really different with my songwriting recently; rather than try to achieve insanely complex polyphonic synth sounds at 140 tempo, I quit the hard trance thing for awhile and made a really mellow, lounge-esque track in Fruity Loops. It's not perfect, but has some neat, varying drum patterns, some real smooth flanged pads, and a simple bass line. I think the "chillout" genre is actually more my kind of thing, although my song with the "Curses, I've been double-crossed by my own devilish magnetic device!" quote is pretty funny despite its generic techno sound. I guess at least Mr.Raddin taught me the difference between major and minor chords. Ask me on AIM and I'll send you the lounge track.
Went to the pool today with Sterling. It's amazing; I remember in my youth I'd go swimming for four to five hours at a time with people, and yet I almost never do it now. I think I'll probably get awful skin cancer from all that someday, but oh well. After the pool, Sterling and I just kinda walked to Jackpot Pizza, and, well, ordered a pizza. We ate it in these people's lawn, and they didn't really mind, which was cool. I really enjoy the freedom of being able to spend money and yet not having to worry about paying for anything that requires any real responsibility, like cars, bills, insurance, etc. I probably ought to get my license soon anyway though.
Tomorrow's the first runway class in my series of modeling classes. Last week's was actually really informative, despite how ridiculous me and a bunch of black guys looked applying foundation and concealer. Learned that it's actually a bad idea to use products that are 46% alcohol to treat acne, and as a result I bought some decent skincare stuff at Walgreens and my face is looking a lot better. Yay for metrosexual people. Jesus God, I actually bought some blue jeans awhile ago too, and I like them. It's okay, though, because they're not nearly as cool as my goth pants.
Fucking Texas is hot. I think I just realized that after living here for ten years. It's really hot here. When I leave home I'm going to go to New England and bask in the freezing cold weather in winter.