morning cawffee

Prantl's bakery is officially a legend. A morning, pre-shift legend. I <3 cinnamon buns.

Unfortunately, The Coffee Tree is also a legend but it's packed on Saturdays. No place to sit. So here I am at a Starbucks.

Riding the fixie is my new favorite thing ever. I was afraid the gearing would be too high for Pittsburgh (39x13), but the commute is really quite comfortable, as are most rides that don't involve epic climbs. The only really rough climbs I do these days are up to Squirrel Hill anyway, so it's really a match made in heaven. Last night, I beat Trevett, who was driving to the O from Regent Square. It felt awesome. I hadn't ridden the bike like that yet, but I found out that if I really want it to, it responds like a track bike.

I really want to get my shit together and go touring. I was at a friend of the restaurant's place for Thanksgiving and I met a woman who toured from California to D.C. Our dishwasher's roommate has done the same thing, riding around the country, living out of dumpsters and a little money, the only planning involved being hitting a few bike shops along the way. I think I could do it on the fixie. It's always scared me mostly because I'm not an expert enough bike mechanic to fix everything on the bike if it stops working, and that becomes a situation when you're 100 miles out of your home city. But with the Schwinn all I'd need to keep around is a pair of folding tires, a few tubes and maybe an extra chain. That's the beauty of the bike--when something sounds wrong, there are only a few thing it could really be. All I need is fenders, really, and maybe I could get a rack and panniers if I didn't want to use my messenger bag.

alice

Isn't she beautiful? I just need to get a cog for the other side of the flip/flop hub--I'd like to have it be geared a little higher. Right now it's set up for its previous owner who used it to recover from a knee injury, so the drivetrain isn't so challenging. Well, it's challenging going downhill.

i have a problem

I do. Today I bought a Schwinn Le Tour fixie conversion from a guy in Squirrel Hill. It may be my new favorite bike. I never thought I'd make the final crossover into bike hipsterdom, but here I am, proud of my straight chainline and one little brake.

It's a beautiful machine. I'm not great at riding it yet, though. Also, I think the track cog isn't on all the way because it slips when I try to skid or put a ton of force in it. But pictures will come soon. It's a shiny, bright red frame, and her name is Alice.

guess who's at a coffeehouse on his day off again

Yeah, this is really all I do. I relax, drink coffee and whore myself out to social networking websites.

Not really. I have several interests! I realized this recently, that now when people ask me what I'm into, I can actually respond by saying I'm chiefly interested in bicycles, food, music, coffee, beer, and women. Hooray!

Today I ate herring and trout, in preserved salted form. I'm currently reading a book about the history of salt and it's made me respect salted meat and fish a little more. Plus, I ate a lot of sardines on crackers when I was a kid.

I also got some nice Stilton and a raw milk French cheese at Whole Foods. Living right next to that store is going to do terrible things to my food budget. And I don't really mind.

I navigated a much quicker way home from Diane's place today, also. I was afraid of riding Shady Avenue for awhile due to the construction (I broke the shit out of a wheel awhile back because the road was so horrible). It's a really wonderful downhill ride. I'm finally beginning to appreciate cycling as a way to get around and see the city just as much as a way to be showoffish. Sometimes it helps to downshift and just look up at the leaves while you're gliding downhill.

I'm totally going to cook some steaks tonight. And drink some fermented tea. Have I mentioned my affinity for kombucha? It's an ancient Chinese tea that's fermented with a specific bacterial culture. It's sort of a crunchy hippie drink, supposedly the perfect thing for ridding your body of "toxins" and improving liver function, new-age bullshit like that, but it's really just kind of delicious. Admittedly, I do feel good when I drink it--there is something to consuming living food. I feel very alert and clear-headed at work, and my friend and I have concluded that it greatly lowers alcohol tolerance; maybe it really does clean out your body a little, leaving it vulnerable for drunkenness. In any case, it's a wonderful beverage and you should try it.

61C cafe

I love bicycles. I'm actually looking at mine right now through the window of the 61C, a coffeehouse named for the bus line it's on. She's a work of art now, although not nearly complete. I put bullhorn bars on last week with mountain bike brake levers--I decided I just really don't need drop bars, and didn't like the ergonomic design of the ones I had. These are lighter and more upright. I'm waiting for the proper brake levers to come in the mail, which will actually plug into the bar ends instead of clamping onto the bars, so I'll have a much larger selection of riding positions (that's sort of what it's about, being able to put your hands in different places to avoid fatigue). Eventually I'll have the cables out of the way, underneath bar wraps. Right now it's bare metal with brake cables all over the place.

I went to Avalon today. I got some low-top Chucks for twelve bucks. I feel like a champion. Also, new pants. Every pair of jeans I own has a pair of holes in the back from where they get stretched out by my bike saddle. It's getting to be a little obscene.

Speaking of riding, it's getting cold. This is going to be the first winter I've really ridden in (I haven't even really been riding for a year!) and I'm really catching onto what's important. Wearing tons of layers isn't so important as keeping your extremities covered--I find myself getting overheated even below freezing when I have a lot of clothing on, but fine when my ears, face and hands are covered fairly well. I actually like it quite a bit more than riding in the summer--I'm less of a mess when I get to my destination. Being sniffly isn't as gross as being drenched in sweat.

Coffee is nice. It's five o'clock right now and this is the first cup I've had today, and I can really feel myself becoming a nicer person. I'm kind of caustic and socially awkward when I'm going through caffeine withdrawal.

Everything seems so much clearer when it's cold. Like the world is one big icy mirror that shows us ourselves in everything we do.

Your results:
You are Malcolm Reynolds (Captain)

Malcolm Reynolds (Captain) 75% Kaylee Frye (Ship Mechanic) 70% Zoe Washburne (Second-in-command) 65% Dr. Simon Tam (Ship Medic) 65% Wash (Ship Pilot) 60% Jayne Cobb (Mercenary) 55% River (Stowaway) 50% Derrial Book (Shepherd) 35% Inara Serra (Companion) 35% Alliance 25% A Reaver (Cannibal) 5%

Honest and a defender of the innocent. You sometimes make mistakes in judgment but you are generally good and would protect your crew from harm.

Click here to take the "Which Serenity character are you?" quiz...

dried ancho chillis

Life can be chaotic. In fact, it almost always is, in some way. We're always trying to get to some point we haven't reached yet, buy something we don't own, go somewhere we haven't been, or kiss someone we haven't met. Human nature and satisfaction don't really seem to mix, at first glance. After all, what is life except what we do between transitions? Sometimes it seems like existence is nothing but a cycle of getting what we want, then losing it and finding something else again.

We're really all just looking for stability, even though none of us can define what that really means. Stability can be a month's rent, or sitting in your new home after you've moved everything in, or waking up with someone over and over and over. It can be gasping for air when your head comes out of the water. It can even be letting go every once in awhile, and just seeing what happens, even though no one likes to admit it.

What life really ought to be is a mixture of chaos and stability. Legume Bistro is a constant for me. It's a ritual, a bike ride the same way every day, a smell that I can never forget. But it's also hectic, painful, overwhelming, and sometimes it can seem short-term. It's a lot like love, or friendships, or school, or like being in a band. We have good times and bad times.

I know I haven't written a lot in the past month, or in the past year or two for that matter. I need to start again. Talking about life like this is a tremendous source of rationality and makes me understand why people write in their journals about the stupidest little things. It's good as something to reflect on, but more importantly, I think it tells me about who I am right now.

Right now I am John Gray Heidelmeier. I am the sous-chef of a very young restaurant. I'm not a bad cook, but I have a lot to learn about food and managing people. I love cooking unconditionally but don't know if it's what I want to do for the rest of my life. I want to sing again and if I could ever make a career out of it, I would.

I love bicycles, because they make me feel like I'm flying. Also, they're full of moving parts that are fun to disassemble and they make me feel strong. The cycling community is also completely riddled with beautiful, long-legged women.

I live in a very big apartment that I'm really proud of with a girl who I split up with recently. I had a really good time with her, and learned a lot about myself, but it couldn't last, and was something I did as a result of one of those transitions in my life. We actually make pretty good roommates, although she's moving out eventually. Diane and I are back together now. We made pancakes this morning, and I dug up my plants from the garden and put them back in my pots so they'll stay alive when it gets cold. I love her.

I love Pittsburgh. I think I'd be okay with living here for a few more years in its charming, unique little neighborhoods. The public transit is pretty good. I might want to go to New York, but I don't want to live far outside the city or pay half my income to my landlord. In any case, a place with flatter, more well-maintained roads could work out. Wheels, tires and tubes are expensive.

I don't really like going out too much. I am most in my element at home, leaning over the stove or having a few beers or being with someone I love. I also love sitting in coffeehouses like this one, where I like to clear my mind of all the crazy shit floating around in it. I'm not crazy about people, and only have a few close friends who I choose carefully.

I am very, very monogamous. I'm also a little bit old-fashioned. I like to open doors for women and take care of them a little bit, and consider modern feminism to be a little scary.

I'm kind of a nihilist, and don't really try to save the world. I believe it's going to end, maybe in my lifetime and maybe not, and all I really give a shit about is having a good time before, and maybe after that happens. As much as I try to ride my bike because it saves the planet, it's really because I never got a driver's license, could never afford a car, and don't want to get fat. I still go to the local grocery store and then throw away my plastic bags when I get home.

So, that's who I am, and that's what life means to me. I guess it's been awhile since I've stepped back a little, you know?